Bloody Soup!
by Aoyuki Hikari
Summary: Story written for 31days April 1 challenge: Dinner for three Characters: Integral Wingates Hellsing, Alucard, Seras Victoria. No pairing. Not for the queasy. A really crazy idea that popped in my head while doing a paper tonight. Slightly OOC.


**Bloody Soup**

The Hellsing Institute leader wrinkled her forehead suspiciously. "You prepared dinner for me?" she asked the scarlet-garbed vampire agent. Her ice blue eyes narrowed. "Are you ill, Alucard?" She then glanced at the digital calendar on her desktop. The display read April 1.

**  
April Fools' Day.**

She pinched the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes in irritation. Letting out a disgusted sigh, she asked wearily. "Is this your idea of a joke?"

When he didn't move, she looked up. He stared down at her, his expression slighted. "This is no jest, Integra. I see nothing wrong to serve my master." When she still didn't look convinced, he went to her and pulled her up from her desk. "You work too hard, Master. You neglect your meals. It is time we take care of you. Come, we prepared a dinner for three."

"We? A dinner for three-" Before she could protest, Alucard took her arm and dragged her out of office.

They came in the dining hall. The tantalizing smells of the food on the table made Integra remember that she hadn't had a decent meal since this morning. Her stomach rumbled embarrassingly at the sight of the table setting. She looked round for Walter, who usually was present during mealtimes but he was nowhere in sight. His absence increased her suspicion. "Where is Walter?"

"I specifically mentioned that this will be a special occasion that I requested him to leave the serving to me," he said smoothly. With a flourish, he pulled out a chair for her. "Go ahead and eat. I prepared them especially for us."

"I thought this was a dinner for three."

"It is. But the police girl is late again and you looked famished."

She needed no more persuasion. The dishes before her looked and smelled appetizing. But as he opened the tureen of soup, she drew back. Remembering his words, she stared up at him. "You prepared these?"

"Indeed."

Her blue eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What mischief have you done now, Alucard? You might as well admit it rather than sugarcoat it by feeding me."

He merely smiled. "I did no mischief, my Master. Nor do I intend any after this," he added as he read her mind. She glared at him. "I merely wish you to enjoy your meal." He set the steaming bowl of dark brown soup before her. "_Bon apetit, mademoiselle_."

Still apprehensive of his intentions, she took a cautious taste. When it appeared to be safe, she took another spoonful. The vampire watched her with amusement lurking on his scarlet eyes. "Why, it is palatable," she admitted slowly as she took another spoonful. The vampire's smirk widened as she finished the bowl.

"How did you find it, Master?"

She handed her bowl, signalling him to refill it. "Strange. It looked and tasted like a chocolate concoction but it is delicious, whatever it is." She permitted a small smile. "I didn't know you could cook, Alucard."

He grinned down at her as he set the second helping. "Walter helped me on the other things I cannot do."

Integra knitted an eyebrow quizzically. "You seem to be more amused of something rather than pleased."

Still grinning broadly, Alucard drew back on his chair, his arms crossed on his chest as he surveyed his Master ladling another serving of the soup concoction. "I am merely glad you enjoyed this meal."

Seras finally came in, smiling brightly and bowing politely to Sir Integra and Alucard. "I'm famished," she announced."Thank you for inviting me over to dinner, Master. I thought I smelled blood served-" She broke off as she stared at Sir Integra, first shyly then with growing concern. Integra, who was now finishing her second bowl, stared back questioningly as horror dawned in the expression of the police girl. Ignoring her smug master, she sniffed the odor coming from the tureen to confirm her suspicion. Her stare going back and forth at the bowl's contents and Sir Integra's puzzled expression, Seras hesitantly broached the topic. "Er, Sir Integra?"

Integra forced herself to put her spoon down and focus her attention to the younger vampire when she noted a certain queasiness in her expression. "What's troubling you, police girl?"

Uncertain on how to handle the situation, Seras swallowed nervously then decided to blurt it out. "Why are you eating blood?"

Integra dropped her spoon with an undignified clang. "What?"

"You are eating blood, Sir Integra. Tha-that is, the soup you are eating is blood," Seras explained faintly as Alucard began to laugh uprariously when the Hellsing leader's face paled then turned green.

Repressing the urge to retch, Integra rose unsteadily on her feet. "Bloody soup!" she muttered furiously. Her face promised a painful retribution later for the older vampire but she was too stricken to care. Moreover, she could see that the vampire was nearly choking with hilarity. "God damn you, vampire!" she hissed. Grabbing a napkin, she dashed out of the dining room.

--oOo--

Seras watched the departing back of the retching leader as she rounded on her still-laughing master. "How could you pull a cruel prank like that to Sir Integra, Master!"

"That was no prank. The bloody soup was fit for human consumption, police girl. But for next year, you gave me an idea." He lifted his glass. "April Fools," he said with a wicked grin.

_ETA: For those who aren't familiar--the bloody soup is inspired by a local concoction we call in my country "dinuguan". It is made out of blood (not human but pig, of course!), entrails, meat, shredded raw papaya fruit and many others cooked into a thick soup. What I was referring that Walter handled for Alucard was garlic. ;_


End file.
